Den of the Truth Fox

TiYBoM Introduction.

2010-11-28T13:39:00.000-08:00

From "I Love Music and I Love Science-- Why Would I Want to Mix the Two?" (the Introduction) of This is Your Brain on Music by Daniel J. Levitin:

The Oxford historian Martin Kemp points out a similarity between artists and scientists. Most artists describe their work as experiments"n concern or to establish a viewpoint. My good friend and colleague William Forde Thompson (a music cognition scientist and composer at the University of Toronto) adds that the work of both scientists and artists involves similar stages of development: a creative and exploratory "brainstorming" stage, followed by testing and refining stages that typically involve the application of set procedures, but are often informed by additional creative problem-solving. Artists' studios and scientists' laboratories share similarities as well, with a large number of projects going at once, in various stages of completion.... What artists and scientists have in common in the ability to live in an open-ended state of interpretation and reinterpretation of the products of our work. The work of artists and scientists is ultimately the pursuit of truth, but members of both camps understand that truth in its very nature is contextual and changeable, dependent on point of view, and that today's truths become tomorrow's disproven hypotheses or forgotten objets d'art.... For the artist, the goal of the painting or musical composition is not to convey literal truth, but an aspect of a universal truth that if successful, will continue to move and to touch people, even as contexts, societies, and cultures change. For the scientist, the goal of a theory is to convey "truth for now"-- to replace an old truth, while accepting that someday this theory, too, will be replaced by a new "truth," because that is the way science advances.

... I just figured out how it actually might be possible for the biochemist and the scenic designer to live happily ever after. More importantly, this explains Ross and Rachel.

Have You Hugged Your Muffins Today?

2010-11-24T01:06:00.000-08:00

I made the most amazing cornbread muffins tonight for the Thanksgiving potluck at work tomorrow. Well, I think they're amazing. You should make some and tell me what you think. They're slightly spicy, but not really. Everyone who knows me will tell you that I'm a spice wimp. The chile powder in these just gives the muffins a little extra flavor. Also, salt is optional. I put salt in because I like salty cornbread. People who like cornbread on the sweeter side can just leave the salt out. This recipe makes about a dozen small muffins. Enjoy!

Lightly Spicy Super Tasty Cornbread Muffins

2 8.5oz boxes corn muffin mix, I used the old school (super cheap) Jiffy mix
2 eggs, beaten
1 cup milk
1 8.5oz can creamed corn
1/2 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese
1/4 tsp Ancho chile powder
1/4 tsp Cayenne chile powder
1/4 tsp Schilling (generic) chile powder
1/2 tsp kosher salt (optional)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

In a bowl, mix together all of the ingredients. Fill muffin cups (in muffin tin) about 3/4 full. Bake in the center of the oven until just golden and muffin springs back when gently pressed, about 15-20 minutes. Let cool about 10 minutes. Ta-da!

Well I Feel A Lot Safer Now

2010-11-23T12:30:00.000-08:00

(Okay, first news post with Maggie.)

THE STORY:

WalesOnline
New Haven Register

THE INTERPREATION:

Are you fucking serious? How in the world do you not notice a DEAD PERSON in the front seat?! Granted, I'm more sensitive to noticing dead people since I'm constantly aware of any potential zombie threat... but seriously?

Now, taking into consideration the fact that parking enforcement personnel have no souls and therefore would never consider waking up a sleeping driver to ask them to move their vehicle before ticketing them, I might be willing to accept that the University's parking attendants didn't do anything the first time they ticketed her SUV. But to ignore a "sleeping" driver two more times when there were already tickets on the windshield? How low can you get?

Or maybe they never even saw the dead person in the driver's seat... which, if true, is even more terrifying.

Even if the driver's side window is tinted so that you can't glance in and see the driver slumped in the front seat, I did my research and found that according to New Mexico code 66-3-846.1, section B1, when tinting is used on the windshield, it "...shall be used only along the top of the windshield, not extending downward beyond the ASI line or more than five inches from the top of the windshield, whichever is closer to the top of the windshield..." So clearly, we know that the parking attendants were capable of seeing into the vehicle and noticing the dead chick in the front seat. They just chose not to. And yes, at that point, it's a choice. When you're walking around the world "just doing your job" (or whatever excuse you want to use), and don't look through the windshield you're placing a parking ticket on to notice a dead woman in the front seat, you're choosing not to see her. It might not be a malicious choice, but at some point in the parking attendants' lives, they did make the choice to stop looking.

So what's next for the University of New Mexico? Campus security patrols ticketing a housing unit for excessive noise at a party and "not noticing" the rohypnol lab set up on the coffee table in the front room?

When it comes down to it, the real story here is either:

1. It's all about the money. On the off-chance that it actually was just a really stupid freshman leaving his car in a red zone for a week, University personnel would rather continue to cite a vehicle for repeated parking violations and milk their cashcow for all its worth than contact local officials about a seemingly abandoned vehicle. Because Lord knows the ticket money means more than the school's reputation for safety.

Or

2. We really are that dumb. We see what we're supposed to see. We're so focused on the tasks immediately in front of us we only see the piece of paper and don't look through the glass to what lies beyond. Call it distracted if that word sounds nicer to you, but I think it's just plain dumb that in a world where a day's value is measured solely by our output and we're so obsessed with just getting through our jam-packed to do lists, no one has time to stop and smell the dead people.

Either way it's just further proof that when the apocalypse happens, we'll be better off. When the dead people* in the front seats get their vengeance, hopefully all the institutions will crumble and we'll all be forced to take our blinders off or become what my favorite zombie shirt calls 'Post Consumer Human'.

*Yes, people. Not person, PEOPLE. While researching this post, I came across numerous other stories (like this one and this one) of dead people being ticketed while still in their cars.

Meet Maggie

2010-11-22T15:41:00.000-08:00

After weeks months of saving anything and everything I could, I finally have the netbook I've been dreaming about.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Maggie.

She's a Samsung N150 Plus. She's got a 250GB hard drive, 1G memory, 3 USB ports, webcam, and an absolutely beautiful display. She weighs less than three pounds and her battery life is supposedly up to nine hours. Given that yesterday I unplugged her at 1:00 in the afternoon (after charging her overnight) and used her continuously until about 8:30 with multiple applications running, I'd definitely believe it. Oh, and she's a red head. Sexy little beast, isn't she?

But why the name Maggie, you may be asking. Well I'll tell you. The main purpose of this pretty little girl is as a note taking machine for rehearsals. Which makes her the first investment piece I've made for Blair Legacy Productions, the (yet to be founded) production company that is the ultimate dream I'm always working towards. And BLP (I keep trying to come up with an 'I' word that I can put in the title to make the company abbreviation BLIP) is named after my great-grandmother, Marguerite Blair. So if this is the first Blair Legacy keepsake, why not name her after the company's namesake? Thus, Maggie.

So happy right now. This computer means my return to internet and a huge boost to my productivity. And it's always a beautiful feeling to hold in your hand something that you've really worked for. Yay Maggie!

Le Work

2010-07-12T15:59:00.000-07:00

Today marks the start of my third week here at the new job. Technically. The first week was only four days long, and the second was only one day, so even though it's the third week, it's only day number six. But it's still probably high time I told you about what I'm doing, right? Yeah, I thought so too.

I am the new E-Commerce Customer Service/Order Support Representative for CK Enterprises, which is fancy speak for "I process all of our online orders". But I haven't been doing a lot of that, since our online store just launched today. So far I've been doing a little bit of everything; reception, invoicing, order placement, invoicing, filing, invoicing, invoicing, creating pick slips for the warehouse, invoicing, and learning as much as I can about the company and its products. Oh, and invoicing. About the company and its products is probably the thing you care about most though. (And even if it isn't, it's what I'm going to tell you about, so pretend it's what it is.)

CK Enterprises is the parent company of le top, a children's clothing manufacturer. Le top (the brand) has three lines of children's clothing; le top, le top baby, and rabbitmoon. Le top and le top baby are typical of what you think of when you think of children's clothing-- colourful, playful, and covered in embroidered ducks and ponies. Rabbitmoon is much more contemporary-- bolder colours, interesting cuts, mismatched layers, and never, NEVER any ducks. Rabbitmoon is the line that the business owner says is "what the trendy moms buy". Which is hilarious to me. So here's a pictorial example of the difference between le top and rabbitmoon.

Both outfits are adorable, but guess which one is the contemporary outfit that the trendy moms would buy.

In the past, le top has been a wholesaler, selling to high end retail stores (like Nordstrom and Neiman Marcus) and independent boutique stores. Lately though, a lot of the boutique stores have had to close or severely cut back their inventory, so the company decided to open an online store to try to make up for the loss of sales from closed or limited boutiques. Our online store had it's "soft launch" today, which means you could go buy adorable clothing from the store if you already knew the store's web address (or if you followed the link I just gave you), but you won't be able to access the store via the company's website until next week (or possibly the week after if something goes wrong this week) when the "hard launch" is scheduled. The online store only has le top and le top baby though, the launch for rabbitmoon's online store isn't until August or September.

The work here is interesting, and actually pretty fun so far. The people here are wonderful, and as I said before, there's more than one person here who I'm determined to befriend outside of work. It's interesting and varied work, and it's giving me an opportunity to learn about the inner workings of business and how everything is connected; marketing, sales, packing/shipping, invoicing, etc. And in some ways, I'm learning about fashion as well. Not in the sense that I'm learning how to pair solids and patterns, but learning about why certain clothes are made from certain fabrics, what a denim weight is and how you chose one, etc.

But you can't not notice that it's a company that produces children's items. You can't escape it. The website is designed in pastels, there are pictures of children all over the walls of the office, the first four things listed in the what the blog is about subtitle are "pregnancy, babies, kids, [and] parenting". There's no denying that everything in this building is, at its heart, about kids. There was especially no denying it last Friday, when we had our "Go See", which is where potential models go to the offices of the company for which they want to model. Which in our case meant 97 children (and their parents, and their toys, and their snacks, and anything else they wanted to bring with them) lined our hallways all morning. It was loud and stressful and it was hard to focus on work, but at the same time it was also a lot of fun and the kids were all so cute.

Working here simultaneously stirs a desire to have kids and reinforces my desire to NEVER have them. Which desire will win in the end? I guess we'll have to wait and see. But for now, the work is interesting and the atmosphere certainly provides food for thought.

Um, srsly?

2010-07-01T15:40:00.000-07:00

So after all of my panicking about getting the audition announcement done by the July 1 deadline, and working on it at lunch day before yesterday and yesterday morning, so that I could email it to T before lunch.... I get a call from T yesterday morning (almost immediately after I hit the send button) wherein he tells me that we're not doing Blue Door anymore. It's being postponed in favor of doing Fences. This is of course after we agreed to do A Raisin in the Sun before Blue Door, and then he changed his mind because he didn't want to wait for the confirmation of the show dates and started looking at the possibility of doing Fences at the same time as Blue Door.

...
...
...
...

/sigh.

I suppose I should be used to T chaning his mind by now. And it's not like we're never going to do Blue Door, so it's not as if all of my work up to this point has been in vain. And since we're not doing Blue Door, there won't be any overlap between Fences and Blue Door and between Blue Door and The Wiz, which is dobuly nice because it means I'll only be working two shows at once instead of three. And since Fences is being put on by a company other than T's and will be performed in a theatre other than the one he typically uses, it will look better on my resume. And Fences will probably have a larger pull than Blue Door will, plus it's a different city, so there's a lot more opportunity to promote The Wiz. It's a cut in my stage management stipend (read "cut" as "MASSIVE cut"), but now that I'm working full time again, that's not as much of an issue as it would have been otherwise. Overall it's probably a good thing... but... I just get so frustrated with T sometimes that he changes his mind so often. I love him, I do. But sometimes I think the spirit that leads him is lost and wandering.

Mah Legs

2010-07-01T10:37:00.000-07:00

There are few things in the world that I enjoy more than the way my legs feel when they're freshly shaven*. Well, that's a lie. There's actually a lot of things that I enjoy more. If I'd been stranded on a desert island for six weeks and a rescue boat motored up to me and asked if I'd rather have a Red Robin Chicken Burger (no pickle, no bacon**, avocado instead of guacamole) with bottomless fries and lemonade or if I'd rather have shave gel and a fresh razor, I'm pretty sure I'm taking the Red Robin. But that doesn't mean that the feeling of freshly shaven legs isn't amazing. Because it is. It's amazing.

I love the way my legs feel when they've just been shaved. And it almost doesn't matter what the weather is like; if I have newly shaven legs, I'm wearing a skirt or a dress or shorts. If my legs got shaveded in the last 10 hours, I'm showing them off. Which I think is pretty standard for most women (and the occassional man who is into shaving), especially if they're like me and have a tendency to go several weeks between shavings if they think they can get away with it.

But here's where I think I differ from most women (and the occassional man who is into shaving); if my legs are freshly shaven and I'm wearing a skirt/dress/shorts/whathaveyou, it's because I want you too to appreciate how nice my legs feel. I want someone to touch my legs and admire their softness. Admire their hairlessness. Ooh and aah over how wonderful they are. I want you to do it. Because if you don't notice how nice they feel, what's the point of even bothering to shave?

You see, I have have very light, very fine hair on my legs. I can get away with wearing a skirt/dress/shorts without having shaved for a week or two. I can get away with it, but I don't like to. Because it feels like I'm getting away with something. I get this strange almost guilty feeling in my gut when I wear a skirt/dress/shorts when I know that my legs aren't touchably soft and smooth. Which is just weird, I know. But the flip side to that is that if I shave my legs and wear leg-showing clothing and no one touches my legs and admires them, I get annoyed. Like, a lot annoyed. Unreasonably annoyed. Because I put a lot of effort into making my legs soft and smooth and touchable, world. And if you don't appreciate my efforts.... well that's just mean.

Now I know that you can't reach through the computer and appreciate the silkiness of my legs right now, so I won't expect you to coo over my legs right now. I'll just let you know; if you ever see me in a skirt/dress/legs, I fully expect you to run your hands over my calves and tell me that they feel nice. Because if you don't... I don't want to issue any threats, but if you don't, I may stop shaving my legs altogether. And then if you ever do try to feel my silky smooth legs when I wear a skirt/dress/shorts, my almost invisble leg hair will be all prickly and not-smooth. You'll be upset, understandably. But it will all have been your fault.

*What is the difference between shaven and shaved? I'm using shaven as an adjective and shaved as the past tense form of the verb. I think that's the right way to do it, but I'm not positive. Does anyone know the answer or feel like doing the reasearch for me while I'm at work?

**Yes, no bacon. I realize that this makes me a blasphemer to every food lover ever. I know. I just don't like it. Don't like the taste, don't like the texture. I just don't like it. No, you cannot make me bacon, or food with bacon in it, or bacon flavored anything in an attempt to somehow prove to me that bacon is the be-all, end-all food. Stop trying to make me like bacon, world. I don't. I'm sorry. I wish I could live up to your bacon-lover standards, but I can't. I'm sorry.

To Do's

2010-06-28T22:51:00.000-07:00

Left over items from last weeks To Do and their progress; clean room and laundry (not done totally, but I'm satisfied with the effort I made last weekend); write audition announcement and email to T (haven't even started, but I plan to do it tomorrow at lunch); clean refrigerator (mostly done, and TLR said he would finish it); paint portion of fence (pretty sure Amma will do this one, since she's on vacation this week); painting for Amma's church (mostly complete, maybe 1 hour of work left); mechanic (not happening, can't afford it, will learn to live without air conditioning); change WoW billing information (yeah, I'm just lazy on this one).

Which means this week's To Do list looks like this:

~~Write audition announcement and email to T.~~ W
~~Finish painting for Amma's church.~~ W
Change WoW billing information.
~~Pack for camping.~~ W
~~Find and clean lunchbox.~~ Tu

It's a short list this week since I'm leaving for the camping trip with Challenger (and what sounds like every member of his family, including the extended parts) on Friday. So the Den will be dark for a week, possibly longer depending on how long it takes to recover from the vacation and my one day back.

Because, you see, when I signed on for this job, I mentioned my vacation starting from the Friday of this week and going until the Thursday of next week. Which meant I could potentially come back to work next Friday. I of course thought that no one would expect me to work a one day week, but I was wrong. You see, next Friday is when all of our potential models come in to the office for their "go see", which is an industry term for "model interview". It sounds pretty interesting, right? But remember, this is a children's brand. So Friday's go see is going to mean that I come back from a potentially relaxing week of camping/potentially stressful week of Challenger-family interrogation to go to work for an entire day of lots of children running around the office. I've been told by pretty much everyone in the building that it's simultaneously the most interesting and stressful day of the year. Greeeeat. Did I also mention that Friday is the last business day before the official launch of the online store? Now I think you may be beginning to understand why I might need that weekend to recover before I can write again.

Today, though, was a lot of fun. I met a lot of people, but not nearly as many as I met at my first day at the Office. (Need to come up with a name for le top. LT, maybe?) Started learning the product, which is interesting, but a lot to memorize*. I also started learning the data system, which is actually very well laid out and pretty user friendly. It's surprisingly easy to make mistakes, but it's also easy to fix them, which is more than I can say for other systems I've used. Also, there's a lot of stuff that goes on in that building. And it makes me admire the business owner (need a name for her too) a lot more because she knows the name of everyone in the building, including the people in the warehouse who pack the orders. That's pretty damned cool.

So far, I'm liking it. Still getting the hang of things, but feeling pretty good so far. I'm hoping that if I sit next to one of the other girls who works there at lunch for enough days in a row, she'll give in and be my friend. Don't doubt the strategy; the awkward and adorable stalk is my primary means of making friends. And it seems that the more awkward I am, the better it works. The last time I attempted to make a friend in this manner, I talked to someone in the hallway outside a class, sat next to them in class, followed them around after class, and practically forced my phone number on them. And I got Stripes out of that. Clearly, the best investment of crazy ever.

*Important note: Footed leggings are not made in sizes above 12 months. Footed leggings are NOT pajama bottoms. We do not make pajamas. Pajamas cannot be made of 100% cotton because it's a fire hazard. Yet somehow, polyester pajamas are okay. Because instead of burning when they catch fire, polyester jammies just melt and adhere to your child's skin, which as we all know is much safer.....

WOO!

2010-06-25T16:08:00.000-07:00

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I GOT A JOB!

In your FACE, job market!

More details will be forthcoming. But for now, know that I start a new job on Monday and am no longer one of the huge mass of unemployed persons storming your cities hunting the elusive jobalope.

Please display more enthusiasm than Oliver Oxenfree, who when I told him the good news, literally covered his face and rolled over.

You'd think he be happier about the source of income that's going to finance a one cat living space.

Shining, Gleaming, Streaming, Flaxen, Waxen

2010-06-24T22:55:00.000-07:00

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As some of you may know, I've been debating cutting my hair for a while now. I'm bored with it. It doesn't look bad, but I don't think it looks particularly good either. I want to cut it all off. But every time I bring it up in conversation I'm met with indifference, disinterest, or, in Challenger's case, shock and poutyface. Even Amma, who has always preferred me with short hair wasn't encouraging. She said she thought it would look better, but was surprised that I wanted to cut it after having been so adamant about growing it out. So I haven't cut it. I think about it. Every time I get a check in the mail, I'm tempted to immediately drive to my hair dresser's and chop off all my hair. But I don't. Because I value the opinions of my family and friends, who aren't exactly excited about the idea. And because I'm worried Amma is right; that as soon as I cut it all off, I'll regret it.

But I had this dream this morning about cutting my hair. In the dream, my hair was much longer than it actually is. I told the hairdresser the kind of cut I wanted and in the dream, it was the same one I want now. The one Michelle Pfeiffer has in the movie Ladyhawke*.

But as she started cutting my hair, I got worried about upsetting everyone with my haircut, so I told her to leave it longer and instead do a reverse a line cut (where it's longer in the front than it is in the back), which is a less dramatic version of another hair cut option I've been considering; the one worn by Akima in Titan A.E.**. I've had a hard time finding decent pictures of her haircut, but here's a few that I've managed to find that don't completely suck:

So the hair dresser starts cutting away at my hair and the visual of long sections of my hair falling to the floor didn't bother me at all. But the hair cut she gave me... Oh man. What I wound up with was mutilated bob, neither what I originally asked for, or what I changed my mind to. It had awful, AWFUL, chopped up ends that reminded me in the dream of the way Dusty's fur looks. It was horrid-- both the haircut and the somewhat nauseated feeling I woke with.

So what does that mean? Psychologically, dreams are supposed to be reflections of subconscious desires or fears, right? Was that my subconscious telling me that I really did want a hair cut and if I try to please everyone, it'll make me feel and look awful? Or was that my subconscious telling me that if I cut my hair, it really will look as bad as other people (*coughcouhgChallengercoughcough*) are trying to convince me it will?

What should I do? Should I cut it all off and risk cutter's remorse and the disappointment of those around me? Should I keep growing it out and just ignore that tiny pull at my heart every time I get a check? Maybe I could do something with it to make it interesting, but still keep it long. Like Kida's hair from the Disney Atlantis***?

Suggestions? Comments? Other movie references?

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*Excellent movie, by the by. One of my favourites. Action, adventure, romance, comedy; the whole she-bang. Plus, an adorably young Matthew Broderick.

**I love this movie; it forever holds a special place in my heart as my first SciFi movie going experience. It got awful reviews from everyone, but I loved it. It also has a pretty bitchin' soundtrack, but I lost my copy.

***I had a high school school-girl crush on Milo Thatch. What can I say? I'm drawn to the smart wiry ones.
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Dog Butchering

2010-06-23T20:28:00.000-07:00

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Phase one of dog grooming is complete and I feel like I've stolen my poor dog's identity. Except for about half of the summers of his life, he's always been a fluffy dog. And then today I took that away. This is not the first time he's been un-fluffy, but it is the first time I've un-fluffy-fied him. He's always been my big fluffy stoopid head, and it's a strange feeling to get him back from the groomers without all his fluff, but it's an even weirder feeling to know that the thing by which I've always identified my dog has been destroyed by my own hand. Yes, I know he's still the same dog. He's still my big, stupid lumper. Now he's just an un-fluffy lumper. And it's my fault.

So here's the results of an hour of me sitting on my dog and attacking him with scissors:

Yes, I know it's not the cleanest cut in the world (and I do plan on going back sometime in here and evening out some of the rough spots), but I think I did a pretty good job considering the only tool I had was a pair of scissors.

There he is; my non-fluffy lumper.

Also, in case anyone was wondering if orange fur is a good camouflage colour for dirt, I would like to submit the following into evidence.

Eeeeeew.

Stockholm Project, Day 7

2010-04-21T17:06:00.000-07:00

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Lazy day today. Don't really feel like trying. So I'm wearing my favorite comfy pants (too big, but in a trendy way, right?) and a sweatshirt. But this sweatshirt ends in an elastic band at my waist. So it's still a comfy sweatshirt, but I'm not completely hiding in it. Also, I tend to think that most "regular" outfits can be made more "trendy" with the right accessories. Hence the hat and the necklaces.

Speaking of the necklaces, I want to recommend the companies who made them:

This one is made from an old typewriter key by the people at Monkapaws. They recycle vintage typewriter keys, china pieces, and buttons to make awesome jewelry. They also have some very cool collage pieces. There are a few companies I've come across that make this kind of jewelry, but I'm attached to Monkapaws because I met them first and because their company is named after their dog. I mean, anyone who loves their pets as much as I love mine has to be good people, right?

The other necklace I'm wearing is one of my favorite piece of jewelry.

It's a silver medallion made by the fine people at Ye Olde Quicksilversmith. The information on their homepage and the video at the bottom are really cool. I'm not sure if you can order medallions from their website; I got my necklace on my last Faire trip (and I'm excited that they're apparently going to be back this year). Honestly though, watching them make the medallions is the most exciting part of it for me. Seriously, watch the video. It's so cool.

The image on the left is the Animal Interlace: "The inter-woven nature of all life, the inner weave of body and spirit. This design is one of the Celtic ‘Zoomorphic’ decorations from Manuscript art between 500 A.D. and 900 A.D." And the image on the right is a fox (of course): "Important in many cultures, though with different meanings. In Japan, the white fox is ridden by Inari, the Rice God and carries the key to paradise. In China the fox is a symbol of eroticism and seduction. In European heraldry the fox represents shrewd cunning."

Monkapaws and Ye Olde Quicksilversmith are both California based companies, but Monkapaws has an online shop and Quicksilver travels all over the country (take a look at the schedule on their website). If you're shopping for cool gifts for mother's day or are just interested in awesome handmade stuff, I totally recommend both companies.

Anyway, on to food. Slept through breakfast this morning, so breakfast food was had for lunch.

Lunch: Slice of sourdough toast with butter
Estimated calories: 185 (Toast: 150, Butter: 35)

Snack: Three sugar cookies and can of coke
Estimated calories: 280 (Cookies: 140, Coke: 140)

Dinner: Turkey sandwich and small glass of Santa Cruz lemonade (organic, less calories than Simply, and just as delicious)
Estimated calories: 550 (Bread: 200, Turkey: 100, Swiss: 100, Mayo: 50, Lemonade: 100)

Late Snack: Dried apricots and dark chocolate (really good combination, by the way)
Estimated calories: 100 (Apricots: 50, Chocolate: 50)

Estimated total calories (so far): 1115

So far, still under my 1900 calories. But we're making port brownies and microwave soda cake tonight.... First time for both for me, so I'll let you know how they turns out tomorrow.

Also, movie with Nenny tonight, so I may end up with a soda, hot dog, and candy tonight too. Because who can resist crappy movie food?

edit: As expected, I grabbed snack food for the movie last night. I had one port muffin (will do a whole 'nother entry on these later), a banana, and 1/3 of a Gatorade.

Estimated calories: 400 (Muffin: 250, Banana: 100, Gatorade: 50)

Bringing total calories for the day to 1515, within my 1900, despite my late night snacking. Go me!

Exercise: Yeah, no.
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A Project Other Than Stockholm

2010-04-12T15:36:00.000-07:00

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My current (non Stockholm) project is what I'm calling the Cradle Project.

Now, before those of you who know me start freaking out, no I haven't decided to have a baby. I'm still undecided, but leaning towards no on that one. Interesting side note, though: Last night I met Challenger's parents for the first time and they told me that in five generations of their family, there have only been four girls. And the girl for this generation has already been born. Challenger's oldest brother got the girl, so apparently the girl quota has been filled and 'it would be a miracle' if Challenger or his other brother had any daughters. Good to know. ...Did I mention it was the first time I'd met them?

Anyway, the Cradle Project. It ties in to that whole, if you want it, ask God/the universe for it and then act as if you already have it thing; the philosophy central to The Secret and represented in several ancient religions, including Christianity. The Secret is an interesting book, by the way, and definitely worth reading, but takes the ask/receive philosophy a little too far IMO*. So what is the Cradle Project? The Cradle Project is the first of a few projects I will be doing that focus on creating furniture for my new apartment.

Matthew 7:7-8
Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

You see, following the outlines of The Secret and Matthew's gospel, I've asked God for a job. And corollary to that, a new apartment. So if I am to assume that because I've asked, I will receive, I need to get packing. Not a problem, really, since most of my stuff is still in boxes. But I am opening them up, going through them, and repacking everything I still want/need. Everything else is going to Mission Solano, a charity based in and focused on the community I live in. I'm not sure about other philosophies and religions, but getting rid of old/unused/tired things is a big part of Feng Shui. The idea is that if you get rid of the stuff you don't use or the stuff you hang on to because you have some sort of weird guilt complex about it, you create better energy flow in your house and your life and make room for new things that you will use/love.

So, how does this relate to furniture? Once I've got my life repacked and I know that everything I want to have in my new place is ready to go, I of course need to think about furniture. Now, asking God for a job because you need some cash, doesn't mean that you should assume it will magically show up in your checking account the next day and go out and buy a new TV. But to assume that because I have no cash, I can't prepare for the apartment that is undoubtedly coming my way shows a lack of faith. So instead of spending money (coughcoughthatIdon'thavecoughcough) on furniture for the apartment, I'm doing what HGTV calls "repurposing".

Over the next few weeks, I'm going to convert this:

An old cradle. I think it was my grandfather's from when he was a baby.

into an ottoman with storage. Probably snack storage. What? I like snacks.

It'll probably take a while because it's got some special issues that need to be dealt with. Problem one; it's raining again. I'm sure as hell not doing this inside, so I've to wait until it clears up again. Problem two; the cradle is old, which means that the paint chipping off of it is lead-based, so I can't just sandblast the bastard. I have to specially dispose of the paint that I need to chip off by hand. Problem three;

some of the loopy side pieces broke off at some point and have been reattached with wire. Which means that in order to fix it, I need to find someone who can weld them back into place for me. Anyone know any welders in the San Francisco Bay Area?

So that's the Cradle Project. Thoughts/concerns/comments appreciated, as I'm still not sure an ottoman is where I want to go....even if I do love snack storage.

*IMO = in my opinion. Watch out for gamer slang and abbreviations in the Den. They'll getcha if you aren't watchin'.
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The Stockholm Project

2010-04-08T01:07:00.000-07:00

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Yes, I know I don't exist anymore. But as I said a while ago, until my life gets interesting again (i.e. I have a job), every day is the same for me, so there's no point in posting 800 posts that all say "I'm stuck on this new chapter of Icewind Dale* and I'm frustrated because this game is too old to find relevant guides online" and then immediately following, create 800 more equally depressing, self-depricating posts that say "Hey, I figured it out, now if only I could use my gaming strategy genius to land a job".

On the job front, I did interview with a law firm in San Francisco yesterday, and I feel pretty good about it. So keep your fingers crossed for me. Seriously. Do it now. Other job front news includes an upcoming contract signing for the stage management of the next season of Ivory Arts Inc. shows. I'm really excited about working with my friend, the Director (will probably update the DP with an entry about him later...probably), again, but auditions for the first show won't start until late October. So for now, I'm kind of stuck in Limbo (and not the fun, but not always fun, Hawaiian-themed party game kind).

Anyway, the point I'm trying to get to is about a project started Temerity Jane. She's calling it 'Stockholming Myself' and her latest entry on it can be found here. The basic idea is that she's taking a full-body picture of herself every day in the hopes that she will see the effects of her new diet & exercise plan or, "failing that, will learn to like what [she's] got based on continual, unrelenting exposure". It's an interesting idea and a project I'm considering doing. If I do decide to do this, though, I don't think I'll be posting a picture every day. More than likely, it'll be once a week or a couple times a week. And my goals will probably be less about changing how I feel about my body than learning to be comfortable in front of a camera. Because let's get one thing straight: I am not photogenic. There aren't a whole lot of pictures of me that I like that don't involve me making a silly face. A prime example:

This is me and my bestest friend. I'm the one on the left.

I love this picture, but note the silly face I'm making. This is because attempts at a normal smile in pictures don't turn out well. I either looked stoned, or way oh-my-god excited, or like I want to rip your soul out through your nostrils.

And then there's the the dreaded full-body pictures. My problem with full-body pictures is, again, not because I have any problem with my body. I apparently have a problem with posture. And not just, 'Oh look, I'm slouching a little bit there, damn' kind of a posture problem. If someone points a camera at me from far enough away that my legs are visible, my spine decides to attempt to jump into the fourth dimension. The fourth dimension being time, and jumping into the fourth dimension meaning an attempt to fast forward to a pregnancy filled future than I'm not sure I want. Don't believe me? Here, one a few full-body pictures that don't look completely awful.

Again, me with my bestest friend. And again, I am on the left.

I'm clearly drinking some form of adult libation (what else does anyone put in those red plastic cups?) and I look like I'm really, really, really oh-my-god excited to see you. As a picture of my face, this is fairly typical. As a full-body picture, it isn't. My posture isn't great, but this picture would not lead you to believe that in a few months I will deliver a baby with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. A typical full-body picture looks like this:

Yes, those tights are just as amazing in person.

What the Hell?! Seriously. It's the same night, the same place, the same clothes. And yet in the time it took the person with my camera to move from in front of the couch to the center of the room, I managed to consume a six month fetus. What can I say? I guess when I see a camera, babies sound tastay.

./sigh

So I am considering participating in the Stockholm Project. Because I need to get to the point where if someone points a camera at me, I don't have to go through a mental check-list that includes "stand up straight and suck it in, smile with your eyes, stand up straight and suck it in, don't grin like an idiot, stand up straight and suck it in, don't make a silly face, and stand up straight and suck it in". Also because it might be a nice incentive to actually keep up a good diet & exercise plan, instead of just starting the same one every few weeks and getting bored. Also also, it'll give me something to write about while I wait to hear about the job in San Francisco. (You are still crossing your fingers about that one, right?)

I guess you'll be seeing more of me then. Both literally and figuratively.

'Til tomorrow. Cheers.

*Since I can no longer afford my World of Warcraft subscription, I am limited to single player, non-online games. Which would be fine, if I could afford new games. But I can't. So I'm replaying all of the old games that used to keep me up until 3a.m. in high school. Some of you might be saying that I could just stop playing games (coughcoughNennycoughcough), but then I'd jut resort to watching television until my eyes dry out and I get a headache. Also, I really am super stuck on this chapter of IWD and that's pathetic, but I'd still like a magic guide to drop out of the sky and tell me how to kill the Ancient Guardians in the caves of Dorn's Deep. Yes, Nenny, laugh at me now. I am a giant nerd.
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Dramatis Personæ

2009-12-29T11:59:00.000-08:00

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Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore, while I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a realization that I should probably introduce you to the other people who may be appearing in this literary venture.

Those who do not already have what I like to call inter-egos (internet egos), I have given pseudonyms for their protection (and more likely, mine, since many of them might hit me repeatedly if they discovered I was talking about them on the interweb).

I will be updating this section as I go along and encounter more people to write about. For now, let's start with the basics.

Family Members:

Amma -- my mother. 63. Single parent and mother of three very interesting and very different (adult) children. Retires in 18 months.
The Lone Ranger -- my brother. 42. Insanely smart. Currently unemployed. Also known as Twice and The Very Rare Furry Duck.
Nenny -- my sister. 38. Witty. Eloquent. Smartass. Currently unemployed. Mother of Warrior and Sillyness.
The Hunter -- my brother-in-law. 45. Mason. Outdoorsman. Father of Warrior and Sillyness.
Warrior -- my nephew. 6. First-grader.
Sillyness -- my niece. 4. Cuter than you.

Friends:

Stripes -- my best friend. 22. World traveler. Works with robots. Lives in Southern California. Infinitely cooler than I am. Also known as Tiger.
Bear -- 21. Boyfriend of Stripes. Poet. Lover of awkward.
Scavenger -- my adopted twin brother. 22. Lives in New York. Chef. Model. Climber. Ex-boyfriend of Stripes. Current boyfriend of Ocelot. Also known as Coyote.
Ocelot -- 23. Lives in New York, but travels for work constantly (current location: on tour with Seasame St.). Actress. Girlfiend of Scavenger.
Badger -- 23. One of my former roommates. Current roommate of Stripes and Bear. Choir Director. Camp Counselor. Boyfriend of KoCS.
KoCS (Kitten on Cute Steroids) -- 21. Goes to school in Southern California, but her parents live in the Bay Area. Actress. Adorable beyond belief. Girlfriend of Badger.
Combat Wombat -- 32. Writer. Smart-ass. Territorial homebody. Always a good conversation and a better friend than I deserve. A complicated history here than defies explanation.
The Boy Next Door -- 23. Friend from high school. Nursing student. Former Air Force. Giant pain in my ass, but sometimes a good friend. Potential assistant for upcoming shows.
Tawn Tawn -- 23. Friend from middle school. Computer Science student. Computer Musician. Lived up the street from me for 11 years, now lives in Sacramento. Fiancé of Chuckles. So much awkward/amazing history here.
Chuckles -- 24. Guamanian. Interior decorator for large venues (think hotel banquet). Possibly moving to Las Vegas. Or Guam. Or Walnut Creek. Fiancé of Tawn Tawn.
Belayer -- 27. Climbing friend. "Does math things". Fantastically good climber, without being smug about it at all. Always makes me smile. Is apparently disappointed that he has a girlfriend.
Challenger -- 27. Boyfriend. Met at the climbing gym. Biochemist. Fantastically good at just about everything and is only slightly smug about it. Friends with Belayer. Gives me butterflies all the time.
The Director -- A good friend and a great boss. Have worked with him on three shows, with three more upcoming. A true inspiration to be around, both artistically and personally.
Trycor -- Former WoW player. Now facebook friend.
Lady Jess -- WoW friend. Blogger of some renown. Member of the original snugglepile.
Algie -- WoW friend. Doomchicken of Doom. Sculptress. Lover of bewts.

The Cookie Fairy -- 30. Friend from former Office. Answerer of many questions. Baker of magical foods. No idea why she puts up with me. I have drunkenly suggested she date The Lone Ranger.
And -- 30. Attorney from former Office. Always busy. Never single. Constantly trying to set me up with someone. May someday be a roommate, for now, a friend.

...I'm beginning to think I know too many people. I will add more to this list later.

Edit: Also, since when do bullet points mean flowers? I'm going to try to figure out how to fix that.
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